The meaning of love

Love. A simple four-letter word that seeps into our lives unpredictably and takes control of our five senses; our sight, taste, smell, touch and what we hear. There is no way one can evade this emotion. It is a word that is too powerful to describe. Someone once mentioned that love is “indescribable”. 

It is one of the most common searches over any search engines across the globe and possibly one of the top 5 in Google. Therefore, in an attempt to get to the bottom of the question once and for all, this author has gathered information across the internet through researching from various people on their perspective definition- on the much-pondered word.

After thorough researching, this author now has decided that there are all together 5 meanings to this word. 


'Love is chemistry'

Biologically, love is a powerful and a neurological condition like hunger or thirst, only it is more permanent. Everyone talks about “love blinds a person” or  “it is unconditional”, in that sense no one has control over it. But then, that is not so surprising since love is basically chemistry. While lust is a temporary passionate sexual desire involving the increased release of chemicals such as testosterone and estrogen, in true love, or attachment and bonding, the brain can release a whole set of chemicals: pheromones, dopamine, nor epinephrine, etc. However, from an evolutionary perspective, love can be viewed as a survival tool ‚a mechanism we have evolved to promote long-term relationships, mutual defense and parental support of children and to promote feelings of safety and security.



'Love has many guises'

Historically the Greeks broke down love into five different categories.  
Philia was seen as a deep but usually non-sexual intimacy between close friends and family members or as a deep bond forged by soldiers as they fought alongside each other in battle. Ludus comes as a playful affection found in ‘fooling around’ or flirting. Pragma is matured love that develops over a long period of time for couples who are in a serious relationship and involves actively practicing goodwill, commitment, compromise and understanding. Agape is a more generalized love; it's not about exclusivity but about love for all of humanity. Philautia is ‘self-love’, but it doesn’t mean tat one is selfish or cares for only their being and no one else’s. Aristotle once discovered, in order to care for others you need to be able to care about yourself. Last, and probably least even though it causes the most trouble, Eros is about sexual passion and desire. Unless it morphs into philia and/or pragma, eros will burn itself out.

'Love is a passionate commitment'

The answer remains elusive in part because love is not one thing. Love for parents, partners, children, country, neighbor, God and so on all have different qualities. Each has its variants ‚blind, one-sided, tragic, steadfast, fickle, reciprocated, misguided, unconditional. At its best, however, all types of love is kind, passionate, and commitment that we as humans nurture and develop, even though it usually arrives in our lives unbidden. That's why it is more than just a powerful feeling. Without the commitment, it is just mere infatuation. Without the passion, it is just mere dedication. Without nurturing, even the best can wither and die.

'Love drives all great stories'

What love is depends on where you are in relation to it. How secure  you are in it, it can feel as mundane and necessary as air‚ you exist within it, almost unnoticing. Once deprived of it, it can feel like an obsession; all consuming, a physical pain. Love is the driver for all great stories: not just romantic love stories, but the love of parent for child, for  one’s family, for one’s country. It is the point before consummation of it that fascinates: what separates you from love, the obstacles that stand in its way. It is usually at those points that love is everything.


'Love speaks freedom yet binds us'

Love is more easily experienced than defined. Theologically , by which we love God above all things and our neighbors as ourselves for his sake, it seems remote until we encounter it unleashed, so to say, in this life of another ‚ in acts of kindness, generosity and self-sacrifice. Love's the one thing that can never hurt anyone, although it may cost dearly. The paradox of love is that it is supremely free yet attaches us with bonds stronger than death. It cannot be bought or sold; there is nothing it cannot face; love is life's greatest blessing.

Love is defined differently and it would be physically impossible to portray all these types of love for one person. Which is why there are our friends and our family to show us the other types of love that we would never be able to get from that special one.